Beyond Re-Animator... Lorena Bobbitt Star Reporter

Beyond Re-Animator: 8 out of 10: If you haven't seen the original Re-Animator drop what your doing and go see it. Re-Animator is simply one the best over the top horror/comedies in existence.



Okay now we got that out of the way, how does this second sequel stack up? While it is no great classic of cinema or even the horror/comedy oeuvre, Beyond Re-Animator is a fun chaotic romp. It contains one of the best prison riots ever filmed, (think Natural Born Killers mixed with Alien 3), the best performance by a severed penis since Street Trash, (I always wondered how severed penises stayed erect. I mean hydraulically speaking… well never mind), and another incredible over the top performance by Jeffery Combs.



Combs is simply the reason to see the film. His Dr Herbert West is older, wiser and as demented as ever. The movie, after a brief prologue, finds Dr. West doing time in one of those prisons Steven Segal is always trying to escape from. He is reanimating rats with homemade equipment in his cell. Soon another young protégé comes along and it's time to continue his experiments on humans. West has found a way to stop his reanimated corpses from becoming flesh-eating zombies.



Does it work? Who are we kidding of course not. As a result severed limbs, heads, torsos, and other (see above) rule the day. Throw in gratuitous female nudity, scientific doublespeak, and day-glo green syringes and we have ourselves a Re-Animator movie. Now I can nitpick about the somewhat slow beginning, the bad dubbing, and the mishandling of the girlfriend/warden scenes. (The movie seems strangely halfhearted about the implicit sadism between the two characters. The director Brian Yunza needed the scenes to be firmer and more explicit.) But whom am I kidding. Beyond Re-Animator is surprisingly fun. Watching the severed limbs gambol about is a riot, and lead Jeffery Combs is so good one wonders why he doesn't make more movies.

















Elsa Pataky flashes some nipple and enjoys some quality time with Jeffery Combs in Beyond Re Animator A


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American Me... Queer Eye for the Prison Guy

American Me: 3 out of 10: In all fairness I have to admit I was expecting more of a gang picture (albeit a serious one) with Mexican overtones rather than a straightforward prison drama.



American Me is a straightforward prison drama.



Nobody in this film emotes; and pass the K-Y jelly because there is more guy on guy action in this movie than in the men's room at a Sex in the City wrap party. Add in the bathroom/drug smuggling scenes and you may be squirming in your seat for more reasons than a slow pace.



In addition, many older actors can play characters in their twenties. Even those that have obvious hairline issues (see the later Porky's movies) seem to pull it off. Edward James Olmos is one man who should never even try. He looks like he was born fifty. He also plays the lead with the charisma of a sullen rock.



In addition to the miscasting and sodomy, American Me suffers from serious script issues. It simply takes at face value the characters contention that they are king of the world. They are not. It is one thing for the characters themselves to be misguided (as they are most certainly are) but the movie itself seems not to realize what big losers these guys are. Sure, they are king of the cellblock. Hurrah, that is like being voted carnie of the month.



A good first 45 minutes or so quickly melts into under acted pathos (Nobody emotes in this movie, cause they are all tough guys see.) and misguided plot twists (the whole taking on the mob bit was horribly done). The movie just keeps getting worse and worse.



Oh and Olmos's character writes poetry; bad rhyming poetry. Yup poetry and anal sex, American Me is one makeover away from its own Bravo series.



And here are parts of the movie for those prison drama /Sex in The City fans (warning may contain objectionable material and seriously bad dialogue)

































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